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When love is a personal journey

Date:

David Conde, Senior Consultant for International Programs

Valentine week is here again, and again we see the many trappings of that significant moment. Heart shaped boxes filled with chocolate candy and flowers of all kinds seem to dominate the entryways of stores.

It is a week of special occasions for wives and husbands, girlfriends and boyfriends and the significant others that finds their way to restaurants, nightclubs and dance halls.

Togetherness seems to be the call of the day for couples, their friends and community. This all seems somewhat ironic as our political divisions and separate social circles have definitely affected our concept of love in America. As articulated by those who know best, love is a spiritual experience that celebrates this coming together every February 14th.

To most of the civilized world, love is depicted as a journey of two people that are committed to closing the distance between them and endeavor to come together again and again. This is also true in the spiritual realm as Christians believe that Christ came to the world to build a Church that later became a partner in a mutual journey much like a marriage between God and his believers.

I recently had an opportunity to spend time with a corporate executive looking to share notes on the best strategy for future mission success. I noticed in her eyes and her demeanor a hint of aloneness as she talked about the challenge of the coming drive to achievement.

The moment reminded me that the journey to something significant is one that is taken in solitude. In other words, all journeys with meaning are personal as is the transformation on arrival.

One of the favorite sayings of people in the church of my youth was that “God is Love” and that God loved the world so much that he sent his only son on a journey of redemption. In that journey that is Christ’s ministry, there are moments when one can see that, whether in front of multitudes or his disciples, Jesus bares the emotion of being alone in a world full of people.

In this sense, love can only be part of a never-ending journey that seeks to comes to itself again and again. The notion that it is also a personal suggests that the search itself becomes an exploration to look for one’s essentiality that was separated and lost somewhere in the past.

So the expression of love for one another really requires first finding love of yourself. Love for a partner is symbolic of that search.

“Calixto y Melibea” in Fernando Rojas La Celestina (1499) and William Shakespeare “Romeo and Juliet” (1597) are plays that find love and impossibility at the same time. They set the standard for the expression of a creative experience of two people that have not found themselves.

When we fly, we are given directions about oxygen masks in a plane emergency. We are told to put our masks on first before helping those around us. The same is true about a true expression of love for a significant other. That initial journey has to be about ourselves before sharing our find with a loved one.

So, conducting the ceremonial aspects of Valentine is not enough. Buying candy, flowers, jewelry, or other memen- tos for a loved one is not enough. What is important is to find that love and respect for who we are and what we represent so that we can then share it with others. Then offering a gift to a loved one becomes meaningful.

The views expressed by David Conde are not necessarily the views of la Voz bilingüe. Comments and responses may be directed to News@lavozcolorado.com.

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